Sunday Morn'

Hey all.
Last night was a mess, friend-wise.
I don't know what I was thinking, getting into this Molly situation.
I ALWAYS seem to end up being friend's with the most needy, insecure, and mean people. Molly is nice sometimes, but she just doesn't act like a friend. I am tired of being friendless and shat on. I want someone who is as nice to me as I am to them, and doesnt disregard my feelings.

We were on FB chat and she starts wailing on about her hair, la di da, and how she is going on a diet and cutting out junk foods and exercising and whatnot, and criticising me for being mean to a girl that she HATES, and I just realized what a bitch she is.

Trigger factor, too. UGH I can hardly explain it--I was feeling so desperate and fat and worthless because of her, and I realized that a friend is not someone who makes you feel that way.
She knows I have an ED, and yet she is always the one buying binge foods and going on about her weight.

If I had a "friend" with an ED, I would support her decision to get a salad instead of mozzerella sticks instead of forcing her to get the cheese sticks.

I would be okay with her not wanting to get a regular cherry coke at the movies and a diet coke instead.

I would UNDERSTAND that if I started to rag on about my weight and dieting, that it would undoubtedly make her feel like shit. (all of these things she has done.)

If this is a confusing post I am sorry. I am just SO PISSED OFF.

Finally, we were supposed to watch xmas movies at her house friday. she, instead, decided we were going to target and barnes and noble for four hours to shop for HER FAMILY WHO I DO NOT KNOW and then going to her house to watch movies. My mom was pissed, obvs. She gets in this huge fight with her dad while I am there, texts me about how she has "depression, like the disease" and I send her this long ass message on FB about how I am here for her and how I understand, and she does not thank me for it, but just says she is "Fiineee :)" the next day when I ask her how she is. and then she goes on about her weight and shit, while I sit there and squeeze the disgusting fat on my bloated stomach.

I swear, all she is depressed about is her GODDAMN haircut, which is the tiniest bit crooked.

I am probably being too mean, so feel free to say so.

Love to all, am going to go study now.